Bio Zombie (1998) May 20, 2007
Posted by Cal in : Blogroll, Horror, Comedy, 1990s films , 4 commentsDirector: Wilson Yip Cast: Jordan Chan, Sam Lee, Angela Tong, Lai Yiu-Cheung, Emotion Cheung Territory: Hong Kong Production Company: Cameron Entertainment Co
Long before Zack Snyder made the official Dawn of the Dead remake, Wilson Yip (who would later go on to helm the ultra-slick and ultra-stylish SPL) made his own. Sure, it has more laughs than frights, but the basic premise of a bunch of survivors in a mall over-run with the walking dead remains the same.
The twist here is that the survivors want to get out of the mall as it has become the centre of the zombie activity thanks in no small part to our two heroes. Woody Invincible (Jordan Chan) and Crazy Bee (Sam Lee) are two slackers who run a dodgy VCD stall in the mall (having seen the quality of their stock, I think I may have purchased some of their VCDs in the past), while Woody’s would-be girlfriend Rolls (Angela Tong) is a vacuous beautician who strings along “Sushi Boy” (the wonderfully named Emotion Cheung), a well-meaning chef in the Mall’s Japanese restaurant just to get a discount. Rounding out the crew are Woody and Crazy Bee’s scumbag boss Mr Kui (Lai Yiu-Cheung) and his beautiful but downtrodden wife (Tam Suk-Mui). It is a testament to Lai’s skill as an actor that he pulls off such a vile role so well after playing the kindly, gentle “Piggy” in TVB’s Journey to the West! From this essentially unlikeable cast of characters we have what passes for Bio Zombie’s heroes – but it’s best not to pass judgement on them until they show their mettle in a crisis situation.
There’s a plot in here, but for the first forty minutes you’d hardly know it. A biological agent is stored in a bottle of Lucozade (surely a recipe for disaster right from the start!) and is being sold illegally nearby. This agent can turn people into killing machines – albeit very slow, shuffling killing machines with a taste for human flesh. The deal goes horribly wrong when the test case escapes and eats the weapons dealers. A survivor is picked up by the two slackers when they inadvertently knock him over in their car – and is given a drink from the Lucozade bottle to perk him up! The survivor, left for dead in the boot of Woody’s car, goes on a rampage when they reach the mall and thus kicks off the zombie invasion.
There’s some weird stuff in the first half of Bio-Zombie that has nothing whatsoever to do with zombies and has no place in a horror film. The comedy factor is so high early on that you actually forget what’s going to happen, and when it does, it’s quite a shock. The acting is quite remarkable at times, and much higher than you’d expect in a movie like this. The preliminary scenes setting up the heroes and villains pay off big time come the final reel because of all the goofing around earlier, not despite it. It even conjures up a fair bit of tension at times, particularly when the pair are handcuffed in the Security Guards’ office during an attack. The zombie make-up is not terribly complex or groundbreaking, but this doesn’t hamper the fun in any way. The zombies themselves are straight out of Romero’s world, and the same rules apply: only severe head wounds (preferably a headshot with a firearm) will stop them, and anything else is just going to fail.
The Mei-Ah DVD is a bit of a travesty, it has to be said. There is a US version, I believe, that has a very entertaining dub, but that sort of thing goes against the grain for me and I can’t see myself ever watching it. The problem with the Mei-Ah disc is the sound – it’s probably the worst I’ve ever heard on DVD. The picture is no more than adequate, but the subs throw up some strange “Chinglish” on occasions – such as when Woody and Sushi Boy burst into the gents’ toilet to find Crazy Bee in there. When asked what he was doing, he shouts back, “I am stooling!”. There are quite a few nuggets like that in here. The main selling point seems to be the very short alternate ending, but it is rather pointless and seems to have been filmed without serious consideration of actually being used.
Sam Lee would return (as a different character) in Bio Cops – an unnecessary and unsatisfying sequel that should have taken a headshot in the planning stages.
Versus (2000) May 19, 2007
Posted by Cal in : Blogroll, Horror, Action, Supernatural , 2 commentsDirector: Ryuhei Kitamura Cast: Tak Sakaguchi, Hideo Sakaki, Kenji Matsuda, Chieko Misaka Territory: Japan
AKA: The Forest of Resurrection
A couple of recently escaped convicts (including Tak Sakaguchi) rendezvous with their Yakuza cohorts on the outskirts of a forest. The convict is not too pleased that they’ve brought along a female they’ve kidnapped (Chieko Misaka) for no readily apparent reason. Shots are exchanged, and the convict’s partner goes down. And gets back up again. It turns out that anyone who dies in the Forest of Resurrection (which is placed over the 444th portal to the land of the dead) will return to an undead state. The trouble is, the Yakuza have been using the forest to bury the bodies of their dead victims, and when they return to life they’re not in a forgiving mood. Which in itself is bad enough, but then the boss of the Yakuza shows up and it becomes apparent he’s more than he appears to be, and holds the answer to why the convict and the girl have been brought here.
Versus is a bit of a “difficult” film for a number of reasons, not least because no one is ever referred to by name. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a film in which not one name is uttered by anyone for the entire length of a film. Another problem is that I’m sure there are some cultural references I’m still just not getting. The final one I’ve started to come to terms with – Versus has some blacker than black comedy that will leave some completely nonplussed. Comedy is perhaps the hardest thing to translate and put across to a foreign audience, and on first viewing I thought this was as straight a film as you could make. Now, I find it hard to believe I ever had that view – at times, Versus is bloody hilarious.
It’s also one of the goriest films I’ve seen, and the gore effects are pretty damn good. An army of zombies is dispatched early on in a bloodbath that would turn Romero green with envy. And it doesn’t stop there – with Yakuza, immortal swordsmen and zombies about, you can be sure there’s enough of the red stuff thrown around to keep even the bloodiest gorehound happy. It also has a lot of Kung Fu (yes, in a Japanese film) which is pretty effective most of the time, but is let down by poor wirework. Unfortunately, this seems to be the Achilles heel of the action scenes in that the wires are pretty much always visible.
It’s also a little overlong (at just under 2 hours) and the relentless woodland setting (apart from a brief car interior shot and the coda, the entire film takes place outdoors in the forest) can be a bit much. And it can still be a trifle confusing. But I’d have to say that Versus worked a hell of a lot better second time around.
Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires (1974) April 24, 2007
Posted by Cal in : Blogroll, Horror, 1970s films, Kung Fu , 3 commentsDirector: Roy Ward Baker Starring: David Chiang, Peter Cushing Action Director: Lau Kar-Leung Territory: UK/Hong Kong Production Company: Hammer/Shaw Brothers
Dracula is visited in his Transylvanian lair by a Chinese man hoping to resurrect his vampires. Instead, Dracula possesses and takes over his visitor (you really can’t trust these evil types, can you?) and travels to a small village in China to escape his exile. Van Helsing (Peter Cushing) is given a lead to Dracula’s whereabouts by Hsi Ching (David Chiang) and they embark on a trek across China to rid the world of Dracula and his 7 unholy brothers.
By 1974, the once proud Hammer studio was starting to falter. In an obvious effort to latch on to the martial arts “craze” started when Enter the Dragon made it big, they decided to join their usual horror house style with that of the new-fangled eastern type of action. To their credit, at least they went to the Shaw Brothers and tried to do it properly. Hammer and Shaw were quite similar in some respects, and they both eventually went into television when their glory days were over (although the Shaw studios’ decline occurred a few years after Hammer’s).
Unfortunately, Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires (AKA Dracula and the Seven Golden Vampires and many, many other titles) doesn’t really work. The action scenes seem bolted on, and the horror scenes are pretty ineffective. There’s a fair amount of talent on the Hong Kong end of the production - Lau Kar-Wing has a very visible role, Si Si is lovely as Hsi Ching’s sister, and none other than Lau Kar-Leung directs the action. But it’s David Chiang that’s supposed to drive the film.
I know what’s it’s starting to look like – this is the third David Chiang film in a row I’ve written about. I assure you all that much as I admire the guy, this is all purely co-incidence. It’s not like I’m in love with him or anything.
Anyway. It’s a bit of a shock to hear his real voice, which is higher in pitch than I’d have expected. Although not able to speak English, he learned his lines phonetically, and doesn’t come off as badly as you might imagine (although I strongly suspect he says “destroyded” at one point). It’s quite a novelty to hear him speak in English, and one that doesn’t wear off. Unfortunately, he is given very little to do on the action front, and what’s there isn’t all that thrilling.
The horror aspect is lacking, too. It might have turned out great if Chrispopher Lee played Dracula, but instead you have a guy who really doesn’t look the part. Having said that, the titular seven Vampires actually aren’t too bad. I mean, they look pretty ropey, but there’s a semi-neat plot device linking their powers to their medallions. They also have an evil lair where young ladies are drained of blood and killed, but I’m not sure if this was included for its horror factor or was just an excuse to show some nipple action. Both, probably.
The supporting cast (Julie Ege and Robin Stewart) tries to add a bit of romance and depth to the film, but once again it falls flat on its face, and I found I couldn’t give a toss about any of them. It’s such a shame that the only UK/Hong Kong collaboration didn’t work out, as the mixing of the genres could have produced a real cult classic. Instead, this vampire movie just sucks – and not in a good way.