AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007) January 28, 2008
Posted by gproject in : Cinema, Recently Viewed , trackbackDirected by: Colin Strause & Greg Strause
“Who would win a fight between…” - the discussions of the playground make their way onto film in this awkwardly pluralized sequel to 2004’s sci-fi showdown extravaganza. AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem, is not only multi-punctuated in a way that greatly overstates its importance (we’ll be calling it AVP2 from now on) but it also takes the less than successful original concept and drags it out over yet another 86 minutes. We can only hope that they take the ‘requiem’ part of the title literally and kill off this franchise for good.
The plot is a total by-product to numerous bloody and unnecessary human slayings as we, the poor inhabitants of this world, get in the way of a long standing war. Although, to call it a war this time is stretching the point - this is ‘Predator tracks Alien’; specifically a new breed of alien which, after infecting a Predator at the end of AVP, has given birth to a dangerous hybrid: the Predalien. Yawn. All you need to know is that they both land in small-town America and start killing things. There are some character details that try to give depth to the ordinary humans, but few of them matter since all these contrivances manage do is make an already obvious story even more predictable. As this bunch of hapless individuals (mostly good-looking teens) try to make a break for freedom, their town is slowly enveloped by a plague of destruction.
AVP2 rehashes literally everything iconic from the original franchises and heaps it into a stereotypical teen-horror plot structure without a single ounce of individualism or creativity. So, we get yet another step-by-step introduction to how the Aliens spawn through humans - that means face-huggers and chest-popping a-plenty in the first twenty minutes - as well as all the tedious staple elements like Predator-vision (the red viewing field seen through the eyes of a predator), an alien’s acid blood melting people, and a final showdown where the predator removes his mask to little actual effect. It’s by-the-numbers storytelling of the worst kind and even the concept of the (stupidly named) Predalien is wasted through a total lack of inventiveness.
An equally lazy script doesn’t help things, as the unfortunate cast can do nothing but spout some terribly unsubtle descriptive dialogue and then die horribly without any consequence. For Steven Pasquale, Reiko Aylesworth, John Ortiz, Johnny Lewis, Kristen Hager and the rest, this is a lesson in paying your dues - the project that they look back on as ‘work’, rather than something to be proud of. Not only is the plot disinteresting and unoriginal, it’s also full of plot holes that might be cleared up if either of its lead villains could actually talk. The Predator is obsessed with dissolving the bodies of dead aliens and alien-infected humans near the start of the movie, but will happily skin a man and hang him from a tree for anyone to find. The aforementioned Alien acid blood is also referenced inconsistently, burning a man near the start of the film, but not a helicopter at the end.
The directors of this movie (it took two, apparently) are first-timers and come from the rather odd background of being special effects professionals The Brothers Strausse, as they are known, have worked on plenty of Hollywood projects including both Fantastic Four movies, Mission Impossible 3, X-Men: The Last Stand [review], Poseidon, and many more. But what they know about effects doesn’t translate that well to their direction, which is as formulaic as anything you’ve seen from this genre. Not even the shocks and scares are effective, which should be a given for any film with a sci-fi horror sensibility. The complete lack of suspense or tension is marred further by the ludicrous decision to face off two black coloured characters in a series of dark locations, making it almost impossible to tell what is going on. Once you realise that the main Alien character looks like a Predator, however, you’re completely done for. During the action scenes, you’ll resort to your own interpretation of what is happening - because I’ll be damned if I could tell what the Strausse’s were showing me.
One aspect that might please fans is the increased emphasis on gore in the film’s frequent death shots. Whether upping the rating to ‘R’ from the teen-friendly PG-13 of AVP is supposed to give it more credibility I’m not sure, but there’s certainly an increase in violent content albeit nothing that would push the film into Saw territory. Instead, they throw in some course swearing just to make sure. Given everything that is so tortuous about this movie, you wouldn’t think there could be one crowning moment of utter stupidity - but there is. For die hard fans who can ignore all the inconsequential 
elements like plot, script and characters, just so they can see their favourite science fiction villains go head to head, will be saddened to learn that even they aren’t validated by AVP2. The final battle is less than exciting, but more than that, becomes entirely negated by a last-minute act of human intervention. A truly terrible conclusion to a truly terrible film.
Character showdowns like this should be the stuff of epic legend - the very idea that two human-slaying fantasy creations could face off against each other usually has internet frequenting teenagers positively elated with anticipation. But they rarely work, nor are studio executives willing to actually answer the central question posed by a title that contains the word ‘versus’. They need to appease both sets of fans, they need to even the playing field, they need to hold on to the possibility of sequels - in a studio-lead industry, the war is never over. So, who would win in a fight between Alien(s) and the Predator? After sitting through two equally wretched movies, the only thing I can say for sure is that it’s not the audience.
Comments»
I just saw the movie recently, and after waiting for it for months, I must say that I was elated. Personally, I liked the Predalien, and the way it could procreate without the tiresome egg-laying, face-hugging process was a relief to me.
The gore and “R” rating was also a cause of happiness in me, for I felt almost betrayed when I found out AVP was PG-13. For both franchises of Predator and Alien, gore is esential, and a stable, so when there was little blood, guts, or glory in the first, I was dissappointed. This movie, I must happily say, easily quenched my blood-thirst in the first 20 minutes.
The ending literally had me running around screaming “No, not another stalemate-*insert swearing*!” I understand that the studios have to make money, so they can’t have a winner or loser, but they can only delay the inevitable only so much longer-either have one win, or no one, not even the most dedicated fan, will sit through another sequal.
There were plot holes, yes, even I will admit it. There were inconsistancies, such as the acid blood, and the body. However, I liked the fact that the human’s were second in this movie. We were the needed catalyst to this “fight,” and that’s how it should be. This isn’t “Aliens vs. Predators vs. Humans,” this is AVP. The fact that people thought to be important died made me laugh; it was almost like a poke a horror films, which these are.
I am more forgiving of the holes because I am a die-hard fan, I literally grew up on these two monsters. I just enjoy the blood, the guts, the glory, and wonder what they will try next.